Happy New Year, guys! Well, for Sunday anyway. Another year is about to expire and make its journey up to that angelic-laden place in the sky.
Though seeing as it’s killed off more celebs than Dancing on Ice did careers, I imagine that 2016 is going to be heading down as opposed to upstairs.
Welcome to Shelley-bob’s review of the stinker that was 2016!
We can’t mention 2016 without acknowledging just how many greats perished under its almost serial-killer-esque whim. We had Ali, Bowie, Rickman, Prince (or whatever he was calling himself at that point), Cohen to name but a few. Even our favourite agony aunt, Denise Robertson, met her maker.
For me, the biggest loss of the year was always going to be Mr Willy Wonka, Gene Wilder. I loved that man.
I loved his sweetness, his humour and those great collaborations with Richard Prior.
Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory was a staple of all of our childhood movie diets. Now he’s no longer here to feed our souls any comedic chocolate in our world of imagination.
We hope you’re living it up with Gilda now, Gene. Definitely my biggest loss.
The year wasn’t all doom and gloom, mind. Leicester City unexpectedly won the Premier League and shocked the sugar out of everyone.
I know zilch about footie but I appreciate that the underdogs went on to beat the demonic Man U and the up-themselves Chelsea to the title.
It was a fairytale ending for the city that usually offers nothing except Keith Vaz’s hilarious antics.
And 2016 has even been the year of the West Cumbrian folk! When killer clowns went on the attack it was us lot, dressed up as super heroes, who came to the rescue. We even had a representative on This Morning .
Holly Willo-booby might have broken down into hysterics, but who do you think she’s gonna call when she’s cornered at the circus? Yeah... Probably Schofe, or at least Gordon the Gopher. Regardless, West Cumbria’s superheroes are my choice for 2016’s biggest heroes.
Now, try to remember, did anything else happen in 2016 that was pretty mahoosive? No? Not even that little old thing known as Brexit?
“BREXIT!” I keep shouting randomly at work – just purely because I like the word and pronouncing it in my angry voice to annoy people. Brexit has to receive my biggest political upset award, only narrowly beating the election of “Trump the Terrible”.
Months on and a referendum later we are still in the EU. So in terms of watching arty cinema and buying pizzas I’m still okay… for now. There’s something going on now about how Parliament has to apply to court to get permission to trigger Article 50 or something? I dunno, it’s all Greek to me. Though not for long if we leave Europe! “BREXIT!”
It’s been a weird old year, hasn’t it? Hopefully 2017 will herald fewer celebrity deaths and more sound political decisions.
Call me crazy but I think that, in the style of the Chinese calendar, 2016 is going to be the year of the Trumpster.
I predict a Twitter-commentated world tour in a motor home with Putin and a lot of beautiful ladies.
Best wishes, everyone.
Have a good... BBBRRREEEEXXXIIITTT!
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